A newly-published report has confirmed what many have suspected: Bristol desperately needs yet more bloody chuggers.
Long-lost entrance to cycle path discovered
After a long and difficult expedition, explorers have discovered the near-mythical entrance to the Bristol to Bath cycle path.
Bristol to introduce immigration controls with Weston-Super-Mare
Giant shed full of cheap stuff will revitalise local high street
Residents of Horfield and Hanham are being reassured that the presence of massive aircraft hangars full of enticing cheap goods will in no way turn their local high streets into desolate wastelands.
Somerset residents use Neknominate to combat floods
Somersetians are being urged to use the popular online drinking game of Neknominate to combat rising flood waters.
Somerset calls on Environment Agency to drown more cats
Bristolians all very proud of woman we've only just heard of
Bristolian Jenny Jones's Olympic success was greeted with rejoicing in her home city yesterday, after BBC sports coverage carefully explained who she was.
Bristol crocodile to star in its own musical
Bedminster crocodile eats Southville chicken
In an attempt to stretch out a piece of non-news as far as we possibly can, the Groan can reveal that the Bristol crocodile has eaten the Southville chicken.
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