Banal remarks about river's height now doubly unwelcome

Dullards who make remarks like "Wow, the river's really high today" are particularly unpopular at the moment.

The turgid conversational gambit, which everyone in Bristol has heard several thousand times before, has lost even its capacity to reassure in light of the Avon's current tendency to burst its banks like an eager puppy leaping out of a basket.

Instead of the usual quick change of subject, or lecture about how the Avon is one of the most tidal rivers in the UK, the dullards can now expect a harsh glare, a "No shit, Sherlock", or a slap round the chops.